imagine being in ravenclaw and going back to your common room stumbling drunk in the middle of the night after a magical night of partying and having to answer a fucking riddle in order to get in your own goddamn bedroom
"what gets wetter and wetter the more it dries"
"your mom eeyyyyyyy"
can we just take a moment to imagine little cute nine-year-old hermione reading matilda
and peering into this book about a smart, bookish girl who could move things with her mind
and then can you imagine her concentrating very hard on the books on the bookshelf and slowly, slowly, getting them to move
THIS IS MY FAVORITE HEADCANON OF ALL THE HEADCANONS EVER